Oh Netflix, you sexy little minx, you conduit to all my guilty pleasures, you must be nearly as exhausted as I am… or maybe you kids started celebrating New Years a little early this year? All I know is that after 15 hours of slinging pixels I arrived home, ready to crank open a little bit of Yu-Gi-Oh style monster-dueling before hitting the sack and five seconds into the disc I realized that you didn’t sent me Volume 8 and 9 like I requested, you sent me Volumes 9 and 10, which might seem partly right to an optimist, but is in fact, mostly entirely wrong.
Netflix, are you trying to confuse me and my burgeoning duel monster skills? Stop it!
Just to make sure that the error wasn’t mine, I clicked over to view my Returned Rentals, and sure enough Volume 8 was listed as having been returned the day after it was shipped. Take a look:
Maybe I just forgot Episode 8? Nope, I went and found the synopsis for the entire series (an altogether humiliating task) and can tell you right now that no, I have NOT seen any of this particular bit of thrilling monster card fighting. To wrap things up, I took a quick peek at my emails, and sure enough, on Monday you sent me a note saying that you would be mailing me Volume 8 for arrival yesterday…. see??
Now how is this possible?
I mean, come on guys. Clearly, our mail lady did not pick the disc up from you, drive it to my house, sit with me and watch it, and then take it back the next day.
Everybody knows that she only does that with Bridget Jones.
Whether we want her to or not.
So unless you can prove that you’re not in league with our voluptuous, restraining-order-encumbered mail woman, I want a written explanation of what’s going on down there at Netflix Central, and I want it now….. and…. if possible, I want in on the action.
You know, swag, and stuff.
Realizing that it might be a good idea let you know that my order was in wild disarray, I decided to “Report a Problem” on a disc that was clearly not next in my cue…
What the?? Steve Carrell, look buddy, love you and all, but you’ve got to learn to wait your turn in my queue.
So now, take a look at what I got when I went to try to explain this entire mess to the good (but hallucinogenically demented) people over at Netflix…..
You’re partying without me.
I guess this means we’re not BFF anymore?
Message Reveived, Netflix.